The holidays can be a tough time to be single, with families coming together and relatives asking when you’re going to get married and start a family. It can be a particularly difficult time if you’ve recently been through a break-up.
A relationship break-up is hard at any time of year, and it is important to practice self-compassion and self-care. Know it is normal to feel devastated and be wondering if there is a chance you can patch things up, or if you will ever meet someone you click with again. At the same time, look after yourself. Eat well, get enough sleep, do some gentle (or intense) exercise, and get back to some of your favourite activities whether it be reading, hiking, or painting. More importantly, connect with friends. The end of a relationship will see the beginning of intense loneliness and it is important to know that there are people in the world who love and care about you. Reach out and arrange to spend time with them.
If your break-up is less recent, the holidays can still be a disheartening time of year as you watch couples blissfully in love with Christmas cheer. With a little more time on your hands, it is still a good opportunity to spend time with close friends and reconnect with old friends you haven’t seen in a while. If there is something you’re keen to do, see if one or some of your friends are free to join you. But if they’re not, don’t be afraid to do the things you enjoy alone. And even if you find yourself at home, still try to be deliberate, and maybe even a little indulgent, in how you spend your time. Soak in the bath, read a good book, or refine your skills on your favourite video game.
If you are quite happy with your single status, make the most of the freedom flying solo offers over the holidays. Feel free and let Aunt Moira know you’re very happy with how your life is and you’re not planning on settling down to have a family anytime soon.
If you need support making sense of things following a relationship break-up, contact Bonnie Ingram Psychology to make an appointment.
